I awoke this morning at 2 a.m. with a dilemma. I hadn't written anything in my blog for quite some time due to a crisis of conscience. I didn't know what my "voice" was, or what to write about. Be funny? Be serious? Cussing? No cussing? Friends and family who have read previous posts had comments ranging from "I didn't know you were so political...", to "It was funny but not you". [Not that I'm not funny, they just knew I took a bit of "poetic license" with certain aspects.] I have been stressing about how to write my blog and from what viewpoint for about 2 weeks now. Luckily for me, I found Aunt Becky about two weeks ago. I can't really remember what led me to her, but I do know as I was surfing around I saw a Blog that was titled "Mommywantsvodka". Being a big fan, [of Vodka that is] I decided to "click the link". I was immediately drawn to her wit, and "rawness". To put it succinctly, "the Bitch ROCKED!!!" Being new to blogging, I thought , "Now that is someone to emulate". Maybe I could be... Dare I say... an "Uncle Becky"??? Then I re-thought the first thought, and thought, "I'm not that talented", and besides, the first thought was kinda "FUCKED UP"! [Besides, to be as prolific as she is, one would need minions to do her bidding, and I have no minions] Regardless, I am now , stalking following her on Twitter, Facebook, and her Blog. So, I woke up at 2 a.m. this morning being all "whaa whaa", I SUCK!!! "No more blogging for me..." "I have no Fucking VOICE or POINT OF VIEW"!!! "whaa whaa..." Then, THE Epiphany Hit. [CUE Hallelujah Chorus]"I DON'T WRITE FOR OTHERS. I WRITE TO GET SHIT OUT OF MY HEAD"!!! It makes me feel better. Aunt Becky has shown me this! So I lay there thinking about this for about 30 minutes before I decided to get up and do something about it.
The mizzrus rolled over and said, "Baby, It's 2:30. You gettin' up?" [She's Southern, by the way...] To which I replied, "I know baby, I've been up since 2:00, and can't sleep. I'm going to get up. By the way, I've got my new blog post. I think I'm gonna call it 'Aunt Becky Ate My Balls'." [Fortunately, the lights were off so I could not see her face, but what I did get was a big sigh, a roll over and what I imagine to be her asking..."And why again did I consent to marry this 'nut job'???"] Being on a mission, I rushed downstairs to my "office", my Sanctum Sanctorum [A.K.A. the guest bathroom], fired up the laptop, grabbed one of the many legal pads and started furiously writing. It was then, I got all "Jerry Maguire" and started the "MANIFESTO"!!!!
I WRITE BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER
I DONT'T CARE IF I HAVE FOLLOWERS
I DON'T CARE HOW MANY HITS I GET
IT'S O.K. TO USE PROFANITY
SOME WILL LOVE IT. SOME WILL HATE IT. GET OVER IT.
I WILL DO NO OTHER PROMOTION OTHER THAN WHATEVER NETWORKED BLOGS DOES.
I took a break, and consulted the ORACLE. This what I found: LINK. It offered a lot of good advice. I now felt as if a tremendous weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I went to work. Ideas flowed. A new sense of purpose was growing. The day went quicker. The work seemed easier. It was Shaping up to be a good day "Tater".
Later in the day, I checked Twitter. Aunt Becky had a new post almost 6 hours after my Manifesto. "Six Ways To A Better Blog". Oh my God. Somehow this "Angel" [Patron Saint???] of Blogs has somehow read my mind. She knows my trepidation, my angst, she can read my mind. [Damn, tinfoil hat time...] The BITCH can see right through me, yet, I am oddly comforted by this thought. So, to end. Thank You Aunt Becky for showing this Grasshopper that there is a Pebble to grab. Regardless of your influence, or my Manifesto, future Blog Posts, may still SUCK ASS, but I'm still going to Blog HARD!!! P.S. Since I referenced Jerry Maguire: YOU HAD ME AT "Juice Boxes Are For Pussies"rj3
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